Live by the sword, die by the sword..

Eat or be eaten.....

Choke the chicken or be choked by the chicken..... in this case I was choked, not my chicken..

Rice and white meat kinda get caught half way down if Im not careful.....an sho nuff I wasn't careful.....

So I'm choking.. cant breathe.. forget calling anyone cause, its not happenin.... what am I gonna say? Gaakkkkk?

I manage to shift stuff around so I can breathe..... which was kinda good..but its sketchy an subject to being cut off...so I have to control a few impulses not panic and get my plan B together... I can't swallow the bolus or puke it up.. then I started foaming.. but Im breathing.... the block is in my chest... not throat.. so plan B comes apart... theres no way to make a hole.... then the sweat comes.. the whole diaphoretic sweat thing.. just before you die..

I'm thinking... my body is being tricked and over reacting.... so I call bullshit on the whole process... my heart isnt an issue... I am breathing...so it just is what it is...

Now the bolus is swelling.....and its 45+ minutes to a ER.... the gag reflex is a constant battle cause the lump needs to go down not up so I don't choke out...

I figure the odds and drive to the ER... I have to stay calm... move slowish...not get excited..don't spike my blood pressure or start breathing heavy....no dislodging the alien.. but theres the foam issue and Im trying not to drown....so things got fancy...but I make it to the ER.... Sweating like a pig.. trying not to wretch or drown....pass out or get too excited...

Breathe in breathe out.... you have 4 minutes once your heart stops and the clock starts ticking once breathing stops..... I'm figuring the odds are good.... I laid out the problem and things are getting ready for a little worst case action.... then I start drinking water to lube it up an maybe force things down....

Nope.... I'm gagging and wretching but nuffin good is happening.... dry heaving so hard my legs shake.... and Im dehydrating....

All good... WTF can one expect.... nothing can go either way....

They plan on giving me a shot they think will relax the smooth muscles..... I'm thinking.... and if that doesn't work?  I keep at it.... straight posture... moving.. cause you never know... then it gets bad..

So I wander off...... Im just starting to heave again and feel the lump break loose, which instantly ends the wretching..... Angels sing... I say. "I'm raizin up ya'll" "I'm Audi" "C-ya"

The nurse has the shot ready... but 5 seconds too late... I'm swilling water and on my way out the door like a stray dog on a mission... which I sorta was....

Mission being get out the door... before I get Ebola, Anthrax or the Plague.... the whole "have a seat on the exam table" creeped me out.... being as how someone left a used latex exam glove on the table.. and latex is porus, so what good are they exactly?

We wont talk about the face masks they were passing out..... I know what it takes to stop H1N1 and it wasn't these Michal Jackson costume looking things..

But I suspect everything......its my nature....and I'm a professional

Shoulda stuck with chili verde for breakfast...... not chicken..  the whole thing kinda messed up my morning....

Lunch was a caprase salad.....an my stuff is sore... my swallowing stuff.. not the other stuff...  that'll teach me not to run around feeding my face without thinking about what Im doing... or lubing the chicken....